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my avocado don’t
This post must never end.
my birthday cake
And God said unto Abraham, “Abraham.”
And Abraham replied, “What.”
God said to John, “Come forth and receive eternal life.” But John came fifth and won a toaster.
And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, “The one whom I kiss is the one you seek.”
To which they responded, “Gay.”
And thus, god made Eve. And she was bammin’ slammin’ bootylicious.
see you all in hell
A sixth grader’s advice to future sixth graders.
that’s one of the wisest things I ever read
Friendly reminder that Ed ate an entire slide because there was a pebble in his shoe.
Well what else are you supposed to do
Mike Wazowski joins the Avengers.
THOR’S HAMMER IS BLOCKING HIS FACE I AM DYING
people who interrupt me when i speak